you flash those cherokee eyes / black as kentucky coal
and run barefoot up the boatdock / bluegills and malboros
in your hands / you grab a dishtowel from the clothesline
honey, wait / let me put some hens-and-chicks in a box
I canned some of those hot peppers too
tonight / you’ll sit in the dark and stare at the moon
my yard is full of dogwoods that make me think of you
weeds fight for space with hens-and-chicks / I’m trapped
in my skin / sore feet and tired old eyes / I spent all afternoon
planting daylilies / see what that is / rustling leaves over there
I guess it’s just the creek running
tonight / I’ll sit in the dark and stare at the moon
she looks up / equations in her dark eyes / plants propagate
numbers in that child’s head / she’ll grow maple trees on mars
someday / she counts the hens-and-chicks / oh there’s so many
like a star cluster / can I take some with me when I go
I want a big house by the river
tonight / she’ll sit in the dark and stare at the moon
Angie Werren, Ohio, USA
Angie, there's a wonderful progression here, and the stream of consciousness/dialog works perfectly. It's nice to see a neighbor here and to recognize so many details as our lives.
ReplyDeleteOh, well done, Angie- my goodness!
ReplyDeleteI loved the first line- what a way to start a poem!
:)
I love this, especially - "black as Kentucky coal, equations in her dark eyes and plants propagate numbers in that child's head."
ReplyDeleteSo many great images in this. I also really like "equations in her dark eyes."
ReplyDeleteAngie, This is beautiful. Each stanza starts with a different pronoun. Each single line continues the pronoun.
ReplyDeleteThe continuation of the hens-and-chicks through each stanza is brilliant. Thanks for sharing your story! ~Brenda
I grew up with those cherokee eyes flashing. But out in the west.
ReplyDeleteThis poem registered with all my senses.
I loved it.